the flaws of the “almost forgot that this is the whole point” tiktok trend

are we living too much for the plot?

note: I acknowledge my privilege in writing this — it’s a fortune to even have options in the first place.

There was a trend on TikTok a couple of months back — the “almost forgot that this is the whole point” trend. I’m sure you’ve seen it (but if you haven’t, well… your screen time must be at a healthy level).

Before it got turned into satire, I honestly loved this trend. I even made a video compilation myself. It made me glad that something as increasingly damaging as social media could have this positive effect of grounding people. If anything, this trend invites one to realize what they care about most, deinfluencing them from what seemingly “should”.

But I found myself wondering — when does self-care, taking breaks, and choosing leisure over hustle turn into over-indulgence? Hedonism, even?

My motto coming into 2024 was “more life”. In the past year, I’ve gotten into the habit of chasing more highs and raising the lows — always finding trips to look forward to, moving my body more, regularly spending time in nature, and seeing friends or meeting people more frequently. All of this an attempt to ground myself and focus on the “little things” and what I’ve come to learn truly matters.

Admittedly, a bunch of my closest friends would know that a couple of other things in my life were sacrificed in place of this whole attempt at “living more”. Let’s get to the point: it was my career. My performance took a dip, and I’d comfort myself from this underperformance by telling myself to “zoom out” — that in the grand scheme of things, it didn’t really matter. That all the stress with my career wasn’t worth it because I was just selling **redacted** anyway. And ultimately, that the whole point of life was living, and that was way beyond anything I did and stressed about with my Lenovo ThinkPad. I’d be lying if I said no part of me doubted how genuine this pursuit to “live more” was — was it really just to live more, or was it escapism? Am I choosing myself by seeking highs, or am I just running away from the lows? Where exactly the line is drawn beats me.

I’ve been getting hit with #careertok videos lately pointing out the difference between Gen Zs vs. Millennials vs. Boomers in the workplace. To some extent, I feel like Gen Zs have been raised to oppose discomfort. I’d say it’s completely fair, though. We’ve grown up in contemporary society where we’re around burnt out Boomers and Millennials whose most common regret is wishing they had done more in life and allowed themselves to have fun while they were younger. But we cannot fault them for this — it’s what they were taught was best to do, anyway.

Not to put Gen Zs in the center of the universe (as we love to do), but we were left no choice but to weave our way through an increasingly complex values system and live in an ever-changing and increasingly-depleted world filled with uncertainty of whether there will even be a future (you know, climate crisis and all). This, all the more, is why I think we Gen Zs consistently identify with each other. We look to common beliefs for answers and treat them as a moral compass because it’s tougher to try to interpret why those who came before us think the way they do. With all the voices and opinions we see online being preached as gospel, it’s no wonder there’s a universal difficulty figuring out how to control our lives.

And hence we rage. We rage against the rat race and choose what makes us happy, feel good, and fulfilled, with a blind eye turned to the consequences. I no longer get offended when we’re called “snowflakes” because frankly, maybe there’s some truth in it — a generational discomfort with discomfort. Perhaps there’s nobility in seeking refuge with softness. In choosing gentleness over grit.

At the very least, some of us have woken up. We’ve gotten a glimpse of the whole point, painted a picture of what we want our lives to look like, and started to open windows and unlock doors to a life well-lived. I wonder how this will shift the world in 20 years.